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January 22, 2016

The 2016 Broadway University Mid-Term Examination Answers

My hat’s off to Peter Alfano, Fred Abramowitz, AnyaToes, Susan Berlin, Brigadude, Tay and Saul Caplan, Charlene DeLucia, Jason Flum, Laura Frankos, Ingrid Gammerman, Don Horn, Alynne Amkraut Krull, Jim Lockwood, Jack Lechner, Monica Maddern, John Pike, Karen Plesher, Ira Rappaport, Arthur Robinson, Steve Rosenthal, Donna Saady, Ron Schroeder, Don Solomon, Rob Wills and Ted Zoldan.

All braved The 2016 Broadway University Mid-Term Examination, which asked them to identify from what songs and musicals more than four dozen similes originated.

1. “The neighbors want to know why I’m always shaking just like a flivver.” (“Fascinating Rhythm” -- LADY, BE GOOD!)

2. “I’m as gay as a Disney cow.” (“Not a Care in the World” -- BANJO EYES)

3. “The corn is as high as an elephant’s eye.” (“Oh, What a Beautiful Mornin’” -- OKLAHOMA!)

4. “Unless there’s love -- a love that’s shining like a harbor light.” (“Lonely Town” -- ON THE TOWN)

5. “ You’re as tight lipped as an oyster and as silent as an old Sahara spink!” (“You’re a Queer One, Julie Jordan” -- CAROUSEL)

6. “Next to her, and she’ll purr like a kitten.” (“The Girl That I Marry” -- ANNIE GET YOUR GUN)

7. “Wanna cry, wanna croon; wanna laugh like a loon.” (“Old Devil Moon” -- FINIAN’S RAINBOW)

8. “All the music of life seems to be like a bell that is ringing for me.”
(“Almost Like Being in Love” -- BRIGADOON)

9. “Do I mind if she fret and fuss? If she fume like Vesuvius?” (“I’ve Come to Wive It Wealthily in Padua” -- KISS ME, KATE)

10. “As faithful as a bird dog or as kind as Santa Claus.” (“There Is Nothin’ Like a Dame” -- SOUTH PACIFIC)

11. “He’d rub my neck ‘cause it was stiff and feeling like the handle of a mop.” (“What’s Goin’ on Here?” -- PAINT YOUR WAGON)

12. “I don’t care if he’s as strong as a lion.” (“I’m Not at All in Love” -- THE PAJAMA GAME)

13. “As sturdy as Gibraltar -- not a second did you falter.” (“You Did It” -- MY FAIR LADY)

14. “Like a perfumed woman the wind blows in the bunkhouse.” (“Joey, Joey, Joey” -- THE MOST HAPPY FELLA)

15. “Stern as an eagle; shy as a dove.” (“It’s a Perfect Relationship” -- BELLS ARE RINGING)

16. “I’m like a kid who’s found a dime.” (“It’s Good to Be Alive” -- NEW GIRL IN TOWN)

17. “Right now -- somehow -- I’m dumber than a cow.” (“Tomorrow Morning” -- DESTRY RIDES AGAIN)

18. “He’s as decent as a minister. He’s as sober as a judge.” (“Normal American Boy” -- BYE BYE BIRDIE)

19. “And Mrs. Breslin has been as busy as a bee rehearsing.” (“Chin Up, Ladies” -- MILK AND HONEY)

20. “And even if you grumble, be as graceful as a grouse.” (“Everybody Ought to Have a Maid” -- A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM)

21. “Suppose he snores like a locomotive?” (“I Don’t Know His Name” -- SHE LOVES ME)

22. “For Mama, make him rich as a king.” (“Matchmaker” -- FIDDLER ON THE ROOF)

23. I’m weak as custard. Can’t make the grade. Can’t cut the mustard.” (“I Can” -- BAJOUR)

24. “You’ve got a face like Dracula – and I mean that in the nicest way.” (“Look at That Face” -- THE ROAR OF THE GREASEPAINT -- THE SMELL OF THE CROWD)

25. “Make the Queen of Bees hot as brandy.” (“Hurry! It’s Lovely up Here” -- ON A CLEAR DAY YOU CAN SEE FOREVER)

26. “You’re packed as solid as a knish.” (“The Woman for the Man” -- IT’S A BIRD, IT’S A PLANE, IT’S SUPERMAN)

27. “For the lad who with lechery’s linked is a bird like the dodo: extinct.” (“They Don’t Make ‘Em Like That Anymore” -- HOW NOW, DOW JONES)

28. “Why should I sit home alone at night shaking like some broken radiator?” (“Somebody” -- CELEBRATION)

29. “I live like a monk in an abbey.” (“Yours, Yours, Yours” -- 1776)

30. “Frisky as a lamb, lazy as a clam.” (“But Alive” -- APPLAUSE)

31. “I’m as physically fit as a flea.” (“Why Me?” -- TWO BY TWO)

32. “Lay out their lives like lines on a graph.” (“Live, Laugh, Love” -- FOLLIES)

33. “I love to spend whole mornings in the kitchen where it’s as warm as a kitten’s tongue.” (“Chain of Love” -- THE GRASS HARP)

34. “Up a steep and very narrow stairway to the voice like a metronome.” (“At the Ballet” -- A CHORUS LINE)

35. “They’re strict -- as straight as a line.” (“Maybe”-- ANNIE)

36. “My head was as bald as a novice’s knees.” (“Pirelli’s Miracle Elixir” -- SWEENEY TODD)

37. “In France, shining like a sun through the post-war haze, a beautiful reminder of the carefree days.” (“Rainbow Tour” -- EVITA)

38. “And I would be as hard as nails and they would only want me more.” (“Color and Light” -- SUNDAY IN THE PARK WITH GEORGE)

39. “He’s like the son I’ve never known.” (“Bring Him Home” -- LES MISERABLES)

40. “The punches he took someone less would be out like a light.” (“Rookie in the Ring” -- MY FAVORITE YEAR)

41. “Like a nightingale without a song to sing.” (“It Might As Well Be Spring” -- STATE FAIR)

42. “Like a fish plucked from the ocean tossed in a foreign stream.” (“Who Will Love Me As I Am?” -- SIDE SHOW)

43. “Won’t they take to him like cats to cream?” (“Wheels of a Dream” -- RAGTIME)

44. “Raving, craving, like birds of prey ‘round the hors d’oeuvre tray.” (“What a Party” – THE WILD PARTY)

45. “You’re like a stinky old cheese, babe.” (“Timeless to Me” -- HAIRSPRAY)

46. “She cooks like my mother and sucks like a Hoover.” (“My Girlfriend Who Lives in Canada” -- AVENUE Q)

47. “Like a ship blown from its mooring by a wind off the sea; like a seed dropped by a skybird in a distant wood.” (“For Good” -- WICKED)

48. “I’m itching like a man on a fuzzy tree.” (“All Shook Up” -- ALL SHOOK UP)

49. “She chopped me down like an old oak tree.” (“Brown Betty” – THE COLOR PURPLE)

50. “She’s moody as a snapper, oblivious as rocks.” (“She’s in Love” -- THE LITTLE MERMAID)


SHE: “Like helping a mouse out of a trap.”
HE: “Like helping a fish out of a net.”
SHE: “Like helping a groom flee from the rice.”
HE: “Like helping Eliza crossing the ice.”

SHE: “Like fishing a cat out of a brook.”
HE: “Like rescuing Wendy from Captain Hook.”

SHE: “Like saving a tree getting the ax.”
HE: “Like saving sweet Nellie tied to the tracks.”


         — Peter Filichia



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